A Mental Alteration

Four months of college can really keep a girl busy. It’s crazy to think how far I’ve gotten, grown, and expanded my worldview over the past few months. They say your first year of college is going to be your transition year. Well, they were so right.  The beginning of the semester was grand and it still is too. The loss of a dear friend to his battle of cancer shook me a little. That going on and being away from home it was so hard to relate to people around me.  Don’t get me wrong. My new friends and mentors helped me and comforted me in the time of grieving, but it was definitely a time where God needed to intervene. The stress of homework, grades, work, and being the best Christians I could be really hit all at once during the last few weeks. You see I have the tendency to overthink and worry about the future and where I will be in the next 2 or 3 years.  It’s a constant reminder every single day that God is bigger then anything and everything I worry about. We have an inadequate understanding of who God really is. We have the problem of reducing God to the size of our biggest problem.  That’s. Not. Okay.

You see . . . I have this dream. My heart will always be in serving. It’s one of my favorite things. You can take this girl out of a foreign country, but never take the love of traveling and loving on God’s people out of her. Lately, I’ve been so down about not returning to one of my favorite countries anytime soon. It’s literally been all that I have been thinking about. I have to remind myself that there is a need here in the U.S and that I need to open my eyes up around me. It’s so hard sometimes, I know. You see 3^rd world countries are being broadcasted all over as something everyone needs to do to be a great Christian. This in itself is not completely true.  God has called each of us to do something great for Him. What I have realized in the last 4 months is that I don’t have to go out of the country (even though I desperately want to and love Mexico and Guatemala)  to make an impact on someone’s life. You see that’s the best part. It’s doing something far bigger then yourself for someone you don’t entirely know and knowing that they can’t repay you. You can serve in your backyard. You just need to go looking for a place to serve. You’ll see J

Constant Reminder

God is the beginning and the end, the alpha and the omega, the I AM. He is the God who makes things possible. Since being away at college, about 9 hours from home, i’ve learned budget the little income i have and really find myself and not only me, but God. I’ve learned to depend on Him each day. I don’t mean just praying to him i mean doing devotions and refilling my cup every day, hour, and minute. about a month into school my mom called me and informed me that a dear, dear friend and mentor of mine wouldn’t make it till Thanksgiving. This completely altered my brain. I was in the school mindset and then had to shift to prepare myself for a sudden death. I don’t handle death well, at all. For the next week my roommate, home friends, and family encouraged me while i was angry with God. I’m at the point now where i know it’s going to be okay. You see Brian is an incredible man of God and loves his family and friends down to his core. God doesn’t want to take him away from us he just wants to be with Him now. I imagine it in a way that if i had a child amazing as Brian i would want them to be in heaven with me too. All of what God has given you is a blessing. Never take advantage of it. The people he puts in your life have a reason to be there. They help you love, learn, and grow. God has authority and privilege to take them away from you. Don’t be angry with Him. He blessed you with them in the first place. Everyday i need to keep my focus on God. Treasure everyone in your life and always see the glass half full.

Transition Phase

Here it is friends and strangers, a post. My friends have been getting on my butt about not updating my blog.  Truth is I feel bad about not updating it since my last one. I’ve simply been trying to find the right thing to write about. I don’t really want to write about my top #5 makeups to use or 10 things to do to get a guy to notice you HA! That’s just not me. What I will write about though is what’s going on in my life right now. Now, hold your horses I’m not going to talk about what I do every hour of everyday and my deepest feelings. This is definitely not a diary post. Of course I’ll tell you about spiritual warfare and my latest read because everyone goes through this and maybe you can relate to this. Others and I call it the…. wait for it…“Transition phase.”

            I am a college freshman starting my next phase of life. Before the schedule gets crazy with work, class, and sports I read a book called “In a Pit With a Lion on a Snowy Day” by Mark Batterson. This book is honestly challenging for me but there are some key phrases that I just stopped reading and went Wow!  College is about becoming successful and find out who you are and well here are some things I got out of this book that I just must share. 

• Success: Do the best you can with what you have where you are, which means success is making the most of every opportunity.
• God is in the business of strategically positioning us in the right place at the right time.
• Lion chasers know God is bigger and more powerful than any problem they face in this world.
• Our biggest problems can be traced back to an inadequate understanding of who God is. Our problems seem really BIG because our God seem really SMALL.
• John 4:18 “there is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear”
•  Faith is EMBRACING uncertainty.

Mark just has an amazing way with words does he not? I’m still in the process of reading this book but I just love it. It is constantly reminding me that my plans for the future and God’s plans are two different things. Although we share some things in common I ultimately have to trust God when things don’t according to what I want. I can be a little selfish in the plans that I mapped out for myself. Everyone does that though. I think sometimes think God even puts us in tough situations that can crush our so called “dreams” to humble us and bring us back to our faith roots and trusting in Him. So, as I begin my embark to college life I cant help but squeal with excitement. The uncertainty that college brings about where your going to be in the next few years and what your going to do is in my opinion ‘normal’.  Having faith and trusting God is what he so desperately wants. Following God’s plan and not your own brings unexpected things and events. GRAB those because the best things in life come unexpected. 

Too Many Voices

So, If your like me i have a hard time distinguishing between what God wants me to do and what i want to do. Distinguishing between those two voices takes patience(another thing i’m not very good at). If what you think you are hearing agrees with scripture, if you see the doors open to you as you move forward, and if other people actually agree with what you are hearing then it just might be the Voice of God. Still, what if its the high hopes kicking in again?   a book i’m reading definitely answered that for me. Stick to what the Word says. What does the Bible command us Humans to do. If it follows that then stop questioning everything. I heard that the desires in you that you feel are impossible are the ones God put in you. God would never command you to do something that couldn’t be done.

“It’s the extreme moments that expand your worldview, lift you to new heights of fulfillment, test your faith, melt your heart, and encourage you to storm the gates and serve with NEW INTENSITY”

Smile = A Universal Language

Well, I’m back in the good ole midwest after a week of serving with Casas Por Cristo building a house for a family. I’m happy to be back and see some loved ones however i’m not happy that i had …

Mental preparation…

Leaving the states once again in 4 days!!!! ahhh i’m so excited to experience a new culture, place, and experience. Some things i’ve noticed when i’m back in the midwest is….”i don’t belong here”  it’s not that i don’t think its a great place to live its just i feel out of place living here. I was reading 1 Corinthians 7:17–Don’t be wishing you were someplace else or with someone else. Where you are right now is God’s place for you. Love and obey  and BELIEVE right there. I’m not quite sure which translation this one is but i constantly have to remind myself that i have to live in the here and now. I cant always be wishing i was someplace else. Of course i’ll be moving down to Oklahoma soon but still i need to be in the mindset of this. As i prepare mentally for this next mission trip i’m about to go on i remember this one phrase from a good book. Belief- not doubt, not suspicion, not fear, but belief- is your permission to allow God to work in your life……..So no matter what happens this next week in Guatemala i have to let God use me completely. This isn’t just for me either. I encourage everyone who is reading this to let GO of all your fear or doubt of the future and let GOD work in you!

P.s ill keep you posted on Guatemala! 🙂

Real countdown begins…

Knowing in going To be building within these mountains in a few days just overwhelms my heart with joy! I know I was made for this!

A Filled and Broken Heart…

This last week I had yet another incredible opportunity to serve with Casas Por Cristo In Acuña, Mexico. I want  to share a little bit about my adventure day by day while I was serving there. So, bare with me 🙂

Day Uno

Today was the day where the things that could go wrong went wrong. Since this trip was last minute for me I built with a groups of people I barely even knew. It was a church group that wasn’t my home one. But did this stop Gods plan and purpose for this trip?? Yah NO! Turns out I grew extremely close to them. I have built 4 houses in the past with casas and the group i was in built for the first time. We had a lot of problems don’t get me wrong, from wrong wall frames to barely enough cement for the foundation of the house to even girls passing out, puking, and being dehydrated.. I honesty could not be more proud of who I got to build with though. I love each and every one of them and not to mention our Casas representative was my best friend. They persevered through the 109 degree weather. The day ended with praying at the site and getting electrolytes and Mexican coke.

Day dòs

If you don’t know how Hot Mexico is i’ll tell ya. IT’S HOT! Today the walls went up and black board around the house. 2 people needed crossed over the border to get IV’s. Building a house is mentally and physically exhausting. You have to put yourself in a position where you need to be positive And have an encouraging outlook on everything You do. Glorifying God even through thee most frustrating times. I Even had times where I wanted to swear at a nail because it wasn’t going in. Haha Im human guys, it happens. These trips will make you be a better person No doubt! You will come out of it a stronger person.

Day trés

We did siesta schedule again today which is basically waking up at 5:30and leaving around 6a.m to get to our site. We would be done around 12:30 and go back to the church we stayed at and ate lunch and slept. We would later return to the site around 4 to build until 9. With this schedule it was so nice due to the HOT weather. Being the hands and feet of Jesus is super hard sometimes but soo soo worth it. Building a house and a relationship with a family you just met that doesn’t speak your language is something you can’t just put into words. Words are honestly overrated sometimes. the power of presence can meen so much! Today we did insulation, chicken wire, roofing,  and stucco.  We worked hard today!

Day quatro

This morning half our group went over and finished sheet rock and electrical. It was also dedicating day. This is usually thee most emotional day of the week. It was so moving. Seeing the father of the household break down and cry when we hand

Baby and me, family and neighbors with team and house and lastly me showing jóse my favorite bible verse.

him the keys to his house. Tears everywhere. I had some pretty macho football playing guys on my team And to see them cry was touching. The pastor’s son of a local church built with us and even sang worship songs at the dedication(but in Spanish). The neighbor kids even came over:) not like they wouldn’t. They love us as much as we live them. This just shows no matter where you come from, what language you speak, or your yearly income We share the same Heavenly Father. Today, lets just say was the day of many many tears as we packed up and left to cross the border. Definetly not ready to head back to the U.S where we barely have to depend on God. Where most of us have everything we truly need and more.

Some last thoughts

” working when your tired, listening when you have other plans, or not giving up when you rather would means understanding that on your own, you can not help or listen or serve or work or accomplish anything of value If it’s not done without God’s strength. His strength endures the endurable and spills over into joy. My heart breaks  each time I leave and fills to the point of happy tears.”

A Little Coffee & A Whole Lot of Jesus

Love this quote and the book it’s from!! Talk about a humble girl right there!!

Remember, it has very little to do with you. It has everything to do with Jesus.

 

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Nothing’s gonna bring me down

If you don’t know me which will be some of you guys reading this but, I have a disease called epilepsy. The neurons in my brain shoot signals that end up causing seizures. They do not happen often but when they do I awake to feeling hopeless and embarrassed. I’m not sure if its bad luck(jk) or God just having someone there for me but, my friend Katie has been there EVERY single time. Whether its from 4th grade recess to the country of Belize To last night. She has been there through the cries and laughter of A LOT! I’m leaving for a mission trip to Mexico in Two days. The first  thing I said when regaining consciousness from the seizure is “I’m still going to Mexico” Satan has a strategy of making things go unplanned so God’s plan won’t go through. Well, sorry to burst your bubble satan but there is no place I’d rather be after a seizure then with Gods people sharing His love. NOTHING SHOULD KEEP YOU FROM REACHING OUT TO THE WORLD AROUND YOU……I leave you with that.

Encouraging texts from the Amiga